Fictional reality

Every now and then, it's nighttime, and everyone, or almost everyone, I know has gone to sleep, and I'm still awake, and I'm surfing the internet, or reading a book, but I'm not fully absorbed into something, and my mind wanders, and I notice that I've begun to start picking at things in my life, that I've begun to start seeing problems where everything's fine or good or great, and I force myself to go to bed, I remind myself that it's never good to make rash decisions at 2 in the morning, that what I suddenly feel like I need to "fix" is most likely not even broken, but just seems like it is because it's dark and there are shadows and I can't see things clearly at night.
I think that won't happen as much once the school year starts as it has been happening lately. It didn't really happen last school year, or at least not enough for me to notice and realize what was actually happening. I think it's the free time, the freedom but the lack thereof that comes of not being able to drive, not yet having a working bike, not having many friends who are able to, much less are available to, drive me places.
It gets lonely up in my attic room, but it's so warm up there that I can barely be bothered to just walk down a few stairs to go see my mom or my grandmother, to call a friend, to do anything, and I know that the loneliness will pass if I just wait.
Waiting's not my ideal solution, but it'll do.

I finished Dollhouse earlier today. I'll have to find a new show now that I've finished Buffy and Firefly and Dollhouse. I'll have to find a new bit of fiction to suck me in and keep me from inventing problems that don't exist.

I like a little bit of fiction with my reality. Going too long without a dose of the impossible, without a story with witty characters who have their own "real" problems that may be made up but are still more real than the ones I come up with are, starts messing with me. I need help getting perspective. After all, at least I'm not responsible for an apocalypse. At least I haven't died twice and lost countless loved ones. At least I'm not a leaf on the wind.

Any TV recommendations?

Antsy, artsy, ranty

So, for the past week or so, I've had a post idea ready in my head... But there are still some things I need to do before I can make this post idea post-idea, if you will, and, when I say "I need to do" them, I mean "I'm waiting on them to be done." So, I've been sitting here, ready and a-waitin' to write that blog post, and it's still not ready, and, today, I realized, "Hey! It's been a week since I last blogged! Why?"
Well, I've been waiting on those things to get done.
Each day, I've thought, "Oh, I'll be able to post it tomorrow! I'm sure everything'll be ready then!"
...Nope. A little frustrating, but oh, well.

So, finally, I'm giving up on having that post be this post. That post will happen, but it won't happen now.

Get it?
Got it?
Good.

So, I've been having this antsy "I wanna take pictures and get them developed and do stuff!" thing going on today, as well as an "Ow, why am I so sore? I worked out in the morning yesterday! If this was gonna happen, it should have happened sooner!" thing and an "Aaah, good mornin - it's 1 p.m.. By the time I get around to doing anything, everything will be closed. Give up now." thing going on, and, as a result, I'm mildly irritable and generally a little frustrated. I was worse earlier in the day, though, and, having eaten some an hour or two ago, I'm feeling a bit better, and I've gone from "I can't do anything!" to "I'm gonna do stuff anyways!"

I'll probably do some yoga or some light workout later, and then watch Dollhouse, and then read for maybe two hours, and then go to sleep, but, who knows? Maybe I'll do more.

Here, have a playlist post I put up on tumblr. I figure, since I've secretly always wanted to be a radio DJ, I might as well work on makin' some playlists, right? If I wanna do it (be a radio DJ), I've gotta goshdarn do it!

Sorry this post is so scattered! I'm sure that post will be much better!
What would you five think about me starting up occasional fitness-related posts?

She works hard for the money

So, I recently (accidentally) got a job as a math tutor, and more specifically a statistics tutor, and, my last two/first two sessions were pretty much fine, and at longest 2 hours, but today's session was 3.5 hours, and I. Am. Exhausted.

My cat woke me up 45 minutes before my alarm was meant to go off, and then caused trouble until I pulled myself out of bed.
I ate toast and drank some poorly made coffee.
I got ready, and headed on over.
And we worked on stats.
And worked on stats.
And worked. On. Stats.

I came home, ate (my stomach had been growling so much the last half hour of the session!), and curled up in bed... for about ten minutes, after which I had to move on to my next engagement (which is going on right now, and isn't tutoring or anything I shouldn't be online for, I promise).

After this (two hours from now), I'm gonna work out, sleep, watch some Dollhouse, read, and do some interior design-y things, and not necessarily in that order.

So far, all I've bought with money from my new job is a book, Notes From A Coma by Mike McCormack, which I have yet to start.

Speaking of books I have yet to start, because I got into a certain program at my school, I have to read two books over the summer, and have just recently found out what they are, and have yet to even think too hard about starting them. They sound interesting! I just haven't gotten started on them yet.

My summer will be ending soon, and I've only got so many days left to get done everything I've been planning to do. I know some of the things on my summer bucket list won't happen, but I'm hoping I can cross at least a few things off soon.

Do any of y'all have anything you're trying to squeeze in in these last few weeks of summer?

Another picture from that little camping trip I keep going on about.

ALSO, do any of you have an Instax camera? I've been wanting one for a while, but I'm wondering if they're worth the price and if they live up to the hype.

Things I try to do/things I will do when I can do them more easily

I make lists. Like, all the time. So, here's a list of things I want to do/will do/already do, and, more specifically, a list of things that make me feel good and productive and pampered.

• Make lists (including "to-do" lists that I actually can cross things off of).
• Read (fiction, non-fiction, news articles, blog posts, etc.).
• Find/try something new (a book, a band, a blog, a website, a place, an activity, a recipe, etc.).
• Make something (a drawing, a painting, a song, a cover, a poem, a short story, a screenplay, a blog post, etc.).
• Drink tea (and, more specifically, make loose-leaf tea, because of the extra effort it takes).
• Paint my nails (something I never get around to doing!).
• Work out (ideally: swim laps).
• Put aside the time to watch a movie or an episode of a TV show in one sitting, with no/minimal interruptions (I haven't been doing this much lately! I think I will today! Do you have any recommendations?).
• Cook something from scratch (with a new or old recipe).

What do you guys do/want to do to feel good and/or productive and/or pampered?

Longer blog post coming soon!

Things I'm loving...

Hi! So, as it's currently pretty darn late at night and I'm tired and not really entirely with it, I apologize if this post isn't too great, but... I'm gonna try writin' it, anyways!

• Welcome to Night Vale: Welcome to Night Vale is a ridiculous and funny and clever podcast that is made up of fictional radio broadcasts from a radio station in an unusual desert town.
• Dorm Design: I recently went through all 68-or-so pages of this blog, looking at the pretty pictures for interior design inspiration. The blog features not only dorm room interior design, but also that of small apartments and studio apartments.
• Tapestries, like this one: I've seen some really cool dorms with tapestries hanging in them, and some with tapestries being used to make canopies. (Not loving? The price.)
• Frames: I've recently bought 9 different frames from thrift stores to use in my room next year (and in years to come after). Now I just need pictures to put in them!
• Lattes: I never really had lattes until recently, when, after hearing a woman order a vanilla latte (which isn't on the menu) at my local coffee shop, I decided to try something similar, and ordered an iced hazelnut latte. It was great, and, a few hours later, I got another latte (an iced coconut latte, this time). One of my friends got an iced almond-coconut mocha, hoping it would taste like an Almond Joy (it did!).

Have you heard of Welcome to Night Vale? If so, do you like it? If not, I highly recommend it! It's pretty darn great. Do any of those lattes sound good to you? What's your favorite caffeinated beverage?

7 years

A few days ago, I saw my best friend for the first time in 7 years. We met 8 years ago.

It was surreal and confusing, and it took us a while to get used to each other, especially because, for the first two of the three days, we didn't have much time alone, but we eventually adjusted.

We were in a big ole city not too far from where I live, and we did all the tourist-y things I'd never gotten around to doing. My calves were killing me by the end, and they still have yet to fully recover, but at least I can manage walking downstairs again.

I normally take things slower when I'm on vacation, but I did really enjoy seeing how much my best friend and her family took on in just three short days. We hit most of the many tourist spots in the city. We were out of the hotel by maybe 10 at the latest every day, didn't get back until 10 or 11 at night, and spent only maybe 1 of those 12 or more hours sitting down, and all the rest hiking and walking and running across the street right before the lights changed. While I was exhausted by the end of it and came home ready to sleep for a month, I felt like I'd gotten a lot out of the trip. Still, I think I'll take things a little bit slower when I travel on my own in the future.

Speaking of travelling on my own in the future, on tumblr, I've been reblogging and tagging pictures that come up on my dashboard of places I want to go and things I want to do (camping, hiking, etc) as places and nature, and I'm just constantly daydreaming about going on camping trips and staying in lake cabins and hiking up into the hills and mountains and coming across little rivers and big lakes and swimming and relaxing and eating food cooked on a campfire and wandering through a new city and listening in on the conversations of locals and peeking into shops and sniffing the air around restaurants... But I've only done a few of those things this summer, and not very often. I'm working on it, though! Since I (finally) have a long summer, I intend to squeeze in as many adventures as possible before I leave to start college (almost two months from now!).

And, speaking of college: I'm still as excited as I was before! While I was in the city, I passed by a sidewalk sale, and almost all of the things I'd been looking for while thrifting were just sitting there, cheap and available right in front of me... and I didn't get 'em. Darn.

I'll leave y'all (5 of you now! Thank you!) with these pictures from a recent hiking/sort-of-camping trip.